Sunday, September 16, 2007
the suspense is terrible....i hope it'll last.
ok, the time is 1:53am and i am all but wiped out...
so, i will try and make this brief.
S.C., Never feel like I would be bothered or annoyed by anybody! I would just be happy to be able to meet a real life person who actually reads this stuff (and possibly enjoys it!).
Next First Friday I will be waiting for you to "Come up and say hello.." Don't let me down.
I just read a book (that was composites from zines and journal entries by the author) titled:
"On Subbing: The First Four Years"
written by the author "Dave" who gives first account experiences in his job as a "Substitute Education Assistant" in special education classes. I lucked into this book being sold at the recent "Against me" show (which I will tell you about shortly). Only $4 and I read it from cover to cover since last night. It was like reading about my work experience in a strange reverse mirror kind of way. Some of you know I am a Campus Security Monitor at a behavioral school with kids placed for expulsion (Drugs, Weapons, Violence, etc...) and the kids that "Dave" writes about are exactly like a good half the kids at my school. Being that my school is "Behavioral" we still have disabled students, just more in the range of violent outbursts, bi-polar disorder's, ADD/ADHD, High Functioning Autism and more. As a young man I feel I have a strange vantage point on my students. I am an authority figure, yet I will run into the same kids at punk shows and art fares. Las Vegas is a damn small town if you look at the number of people inhabiting the area of land. And "Dave" the author has that same kind of vantage point, he is an "old school" punk, an activist and a vegan (though we do differ there... sorry Dave). I have always felt so out of place in the school district due to my beliefs and my taste in music and culture and of course my age (Dave starts in the school district at 25 and I started as campus security at 23... now I am a healthy 27 A.K.A. "OLD"). Just a fantastic read even if you aren't looking through the same glass as him and I. As students or former students or teachers... it makes for a good read to see that those people who are teaching or subbing the same class you are in or had been in has human beings in it who aren't born and bred into their job, but have human needs and wants and likes. Humanity in the classroom... who would have thought? Find "Microcosm Publishing" online and buy this book! And even if you don't, they have a grip of independently produced zines and book/zine collaborations.
Friday Night I went to see "Against Me"
What a great an amazing show.
The opening act was a guy doing the solo acoustic act thing and sounded really tight. I wrote his name down but am too lazy to go digging through crap to find it right at this moment, if you truly must know his name e-mail me at Captpirateface@aol.com and I will find it.
Second up was a band called "Matt and Kim". Matt sang and played keyboard while Kim played drums. What a fun, entertaining set. In fact we (my whole friggin' family... wife, Son and myself.) dug them so much we bought both Cd's they had for sale. After they finished playing, my wife talked to Kim and she was incredibly sweet. She gave my four year old son drumsticks and felt compelled to give him a hug. She never stopped smiling and I feel that if there were more people like her in the world... things would be groovy.
Finally Against me took the stage. Barely stopping to catch there breath they hammered through songs and the crowd went total ape shit! Every song had a force of it's own and hammered the crowd into a frenzy. Apparently near the last song a security guard put a kid in a headlock and the singer stopped playing and demanded that the security guard let the kid go, after the kid was let go the singer stated that he would not continue until the security guard left from his sight. After the security guard left he jumped right back into the music. It was a true to God, punk rock moment. Good times.
and last but not least...
Tonight I had the pleasure of seeing Modest Mouse.
The opening act nearly made me kill myself. It was like watching James Blunt go country/folk. Gak. Then Modest mouse took to the stage. Another tight band with huge amounts of energy and timing. Two drummers played systematically, and I lost track of the various instruments being used. All in all it was good stuff. Unfortunately, my Achilles Tendinitis started acting up severely and even the pain pill and beer weren't enough to let me stand and enjoy the rest of the show. So I found a wall and got strange looks as I wrote poetry while girls grind danced on their boyfriends to the hypnotic sounds of Modest Mouse.
And here is what was wrote baby!
Blue Lights and Broken Concentration
My heartstrings have been pulled and are on the verge of a pitiful
But I will make due.
The never ending battle of stuffing crumpled poems and letters and
debris into an already filled trashcan is cathartic but still so simple.
Am I discarding trash?
I shut up with a mouthfull of red wine and soft gentle music
screwing my head back on while the wife get's her hate on just two rooms away.
Close your eyes and read this...
it usually comes out better this way.
Sorry, Wrong Era
Birth canal and first taste of air screams...
The easy part.
Living in the now
My questions are simple...
Did true love die with the Atomic Bomb?
My answers are muddled.
It's a paper fantasy to want the happy ending.
My two cents worth
I just happen to leave broken children in my wake whenever I go.
I have a few tricks left up these thick and meaty sleeves.
Smile, and you may just get one back...
Twice as coy,
Three times as wicked.
Now I hate to cut htis short but Pandora's Box awaits...
And I am in a mad rush to fuck the world.
Goodnight silly rabbit's.
How can you save me when you can't save yourself?
"nothing can save
it keeps the walls
— Charles Bukowski
it keeps the walls
— Charles Bukowski