The dark churning water in my ocean of a heart.

Mad World
Gary Jules (cover of Tears for Fears)

All around me are familiar faces
Worn out places, worn out faces
Bright and early for their daily races
Going nowhere, going nowhere
Their tears are filling up their glasses
No expression, no expression
Hide my head I want to drown my sorrow
No tomorrow, no tomorrow
And I find it kind of funny
I find it kind of sad
The dreams in which I'm dying
Are the best I've ever had
I find it hard to tell you
I find it hard to take
When people run in circles
It's a very, very
Mad World
Mad world


Children waiting for the day they feel good
Happy Birthday, Happy Birthday
And I feel the way that every child should
Sit and listen, sit and listen
Went to school and I was very nervous
No one knew me, no one knew me
Hello teacher tell me what's my lesson
Look right through me, look right through me
And I find it kind of funny
I find it kind of sad
The dreams in which I'm dying
Are the best I've ever had
I find it hard to tell you
I find it hard to take
When people run in circles
It's a very, very
Mad World
Mad World
Enlarging your world
Mad World.






I knew an old woman who swallowed a fly...
I don't know why she swallowed the fly.....
Perhaps she'll die?





Confessions:
I shit blood.
I eat when bored.
Write bad poetry.
Can't decide if I still believe in God.
Hate one of my jobs.
Got yelled at by two supervisors in the job I hate today and it took my all not to let out a barrage of pirate-like curses... Those evil fucking bitch's.
I can't live up to my wife's expectations.
I really needed a friend today and called my wife and just could not bring herself to be nice to me so I got off the phone and sat in my office at the job I love letting my misery sink in.
We ignored each other most of this evening but before she went to bed she kissed me on the top of my head and I almost broke down into tears and told her, "That's all I wanted all day."
I live vicariously through younger co-workers at the job I hate giving them advice I never followed but should have so they never have the chance to grow up to be like me.
I am currently listening to Prince sing "The Beautiful ones", and enjoying the hell out of it.
I get up and breath and live all and only for my son.
I hope someone finds my shitty little poetry zine that I stuffed in the free magazines at Zia Records.
I am a very sad sea captain indeed...
My buried treasure is to just be loved.

I feel like I am left with a...............


Word.


If anybody would like to, print out-display-use as a link on their blog or myspace-this nifty little ghetto logo I came up that would totally make my day. If you do... Let me know so I can return the favor and rock your info in my links section...

And here are some things not worth reading or really writing about...














This stupid thing

Balance this facade.
Should I choose chicken or steak?
Or misbehave and tear into the fish.
The last time I saw you smile...
I was foolish and brave and ready to fuck the world.
The last time I saw you smile...
I was foolish and brave and ready to fuck the world.
We had been deranged in love ready to leap into the sun...
now just deranged.
Wouldn't it be a riot if we prayed for one another before going to sleep?
Some things just cant be considered funny these days.


Night of the Lepus

I walked around my Grandmothers a full two weeks before Christmas.
Chewing on a plastic baby Jesus...
Now curiously missing from the manger.
"This is my flesh"....
Heh...
Yeah I guess so.
I hadn't been a complete fiend though, and found a Jesus stand in...
a little
plastic
rabbit."
"God bless us... every one"
But Tiny Tim never met me now did he?


The noise of my heart (as it winds down dying)

My charisma has bottomed out.
And whatever charm I used to posses is nil.
We get older.
We die a little bit and te skin falls off.
No more romance in the bones.
We leave you a shadow of a memory.
Twitching in a corner.










Goodnight/Morning

Love, The Captain.