Capt.PirateFace
wnload.
"I felt like crying but nothing came out. it was just a sort of sad sickness, sick sad, when you can't feel any worse. I think you know it. I think everybody knows it now and then. but I think I have known it pretty often, too often." — Charles Bukowski (Tales of Ordinary Madness)
Sunday, July 31, 2011
and this problems made you ill....
weird night...
i wish i knew why i am apparently an asshole all the time.
You just suck captain... face it.
i wish i knew why i am apparently an asshole all the time.
You just suck captain... face it.
captain pirateface
Saturday, July 30, 2011
Vamp'd
At counts bar... Vampd... He is currently rocking lead vocals to a sabbath cover. Awesome bar by the way
Capt.PirateFace
Capt.PirateFace
..?..
so. went to bed sad. woke up sad. fuck me i hate depression... my favorite answer to the question i have never asked is "Why don't you just try and be happy?" my response.. "Why don't you all just try and not be assholes?" "Hmm?"
whatever
i woke up feeling sad and irrational... then mean... then sad again.
i am sure it partially has to do with missing and not seeing my lady for the last few days...
i am just a big fat moody fuck i guess.
below the waterline
can't focus...
through the water's ripples.
clear water with flecks of green moss.
wish i could see past the water line...
and figure out who's drowning me.
in the end just say fuck it
fuck it.
whatever
i woke up feeling sad and irrational... then mean... then sad again.
i am sure it partially has to do with missing and not seeing my lady for the last few days...
i am just a big fat moody fuck i guess.
below the waterline
can't focus...
through the water's ripples.
clear water with flecks of green moss.
wish i could see past the water line...
and figure out who's drowning me.
in the end just say fuck it
fuck it.
Friday, July 29, 2011
Random Bullshit.
Some stuff I enjoy:
The Frames
Soundboard Pranks
The Frames
and just beautiful song's in general...
Venues I used to book...
Or anything Tim & Eric
And this..
and that...
The saddest scene in Cinematic History...
And Die Antwoord
and Ok Go
and more memories...
and Jason Webley
and the best of the 80's....
and late 70's...
ok enough.
Beast Man and Skeletor: A beautiful story of love defined. and... Bad dudes... Who be badder?
yep....
HAPPY FRIDAY MY PEEPS!
Who do you think would win in a fight?
These guys?
("Return to Oz" is kinda creepy anyhow right?)
or these guys?
The Baseball Furies???
The Baseball Furies???
My money would be on these dudes...
Captain PirateFace
Needle in the Hay.
Ironic that later in life his true life brother Owen attempted this as well....
but not for a movie scene. The first time I saw this was in the theater... It also happened to be the first time I had heard Elliot Smith. When this scene was over I was wiping tears from my face. And now I love Elliot Smiths music and am a huge Wes Anderson fan. So there's a little story for you.
The Captain
My heart is sore....
Just when we think we know everything... we know jack shit.
But music keeps us honest. Music and love.
I miss my girl...
and you know what?........ she misses me too. :)
Been reading back in this blog tonight and came upon something that tore through my heart like an arrow. From when I was still with my ex-wife. I wasn't sad due to any "romantic" reasons... I hope that doesn't sound mean... but it's the truth... this thing I came upon was about me from my own mouth and it was pathetic and sad and heartbreaking... but eye opening as well. I truly think I am weak sometimes... but after witnessing this.... I have never felt stronger. And it makes me appreciate that beautiful lady above all the more...
now on to something less dramatic and more funny!
an old poem by your's truly from a few years back posted on this here blog!
Two old gal's gossip.
"Such a kind face..."
"I know, but from what I hear he has something a tad bit unnerving about him"
"Like what?"
"Talks to himself, has bad mood swings... his Grandmother... you know... Sandy. Well she act's very proud of him and calls him a writer all the time but can't find a single thing he has written to show off because she's embarrassed by the filth he writes. So, usually she shows off to most people a poem he had written in elementary school he had written about clouds."
"That is such a shame."
"Still though... There is one thing.."
"Whats that?"
"He isn't a slouch in the bed baby!"
Giggling then erupts until false teeth fall from the mouths and go shattering on the floor into a thousand pieces sticky with the hot wet gummy spit of two cackling old ladies.
yep..
Well... I am tired now... and all I can leave you with is this...
"The work of the eyes is done. Go now and do the heart-work on the images imprisoned within you."
-Rainer Marie Rilke-
and goodnight....
Captain PirateFace
Thursday, July 28, 2011
I was alone... I was all by myself... no-one was looking... I was thinking of you...
Missing someone....
Capt.PirateFace
Capt.PirateFace
p.s. One of the "very few" Green Day songs I like... I like this guy... Hate the regular singer. just to let you know.
Wednesday, July 27, 2011
Tuesday, July 26, 2011
Maps.........
So damn beautiful.... the song too ;)
Goodnight Chickpeas!
Captain PirateFace
we fumble... we sway... we stumble.... we play.
the thoughts that consume me are all consuming. too much on the plate... always a little bit scared. I find myself dancing alone to terrible music on repeat... trying out new moves with every chord progression. I miss the times when the world took a bite out of me but didn't leave those pointy little shark teeth in the flesh like it does now.
The sun rises tomorrow to find me vigilant and waiting for the corruption of the night...
where i will snore so loud it will make the heavens quiver.
Goodnight ;)
Captain PirateFace
The sun rises tomorrow to find me vigilant and waiting for the corruption of the night...
where i will snore so loud it will make the heavens quiver.
Goodnight ;)
Captain PirateFace
Monday, July 25, 2011
shush yer face...
.......stop talking captain.....stop being....you. Shush your mind and your mouth....eeeeeeeediot!
Capt.PirateFace
Capt.PirateFace
R.I.P. Whinehouse
Oh Amy... if only you were as strong as your amazing voice.
Rest in peace.... Amy Jade Winehouse (14 September 1983 – 23 July 2011)
and when the day ends, who are we really anyway?
"You changed all the lead... sleeping in my head to gold."
i just ran into and old "thing" i wrote and wanted to re-post it here for my own self serving satisfaction...
This is not what you think
this is not an attack.
this is not planes being flown at high speeds into office buildings. this is not a kind smile from the elderly checkout lady at 3am. this is not getting the girls phone number. this is not discovering a new band. this is not the rape and murder of a beauty pageant contestant. this is not watching a baby be born. this is not a love letter. this is not having your chest explode with a snipers bullet while filling up your gas tank. this is not watching the pizza mans collar bomb explode. this is not begging for sex. this is not paying for it either. this is not watching your mother cry. this is not putting flowers on a tomb stone. this is not electric hooded torture in a far off prison in a far off land. this is not an eating contest. this is not public rape. this is not seduction, sedation or breakfast in bed. this is not HALO 2. this is not funny or fun or sexy or slimming. this is not a super model gagging out the food after lunch before another shoot and another line. this is not crack cocaine and this is not a new pet puppy. this is not grandma and grandpa. this is not a child being stolen in the middle of the night. this is not man walking on the moon. this is not Lindsay Lohan's vagina. this is not a will. this is not a diary. this is not a healthy read. this is not love. this is not compassion or empathy. this is not an ad for the american heart association. this is not bam Margera getting paid bank to humiliate his parents. this is not a porn start writing a book. this is not George Lucas fucking up another star wars film. this is not SARS. this is not puberty. this is not Paris Hiltons singing career or her amature porn leaked on the internet. this is not the way to end wars. this is not Jim Jones watching his flock choke on the cyanide in their flavor-aid. this is not a test. What is this? I don't think I will ever know.
So... My head is hurting today.... i feel haggard and down. i don't know what the hell is wrong with me....
i feel like i can't help the people i love... not because i don't wan't to... i am just to stupid to figure out how....
so my purpose? who knows... how can one have a purpose? or is it "Captain Useless" from here on out...
sorry
Waging war on my soul
my head is tired
swimming
I cannot seem to keep a solid hold on the world around me...
i feel lost.
how can you save them all when you can't save yourself?
Even now as the stomach bleeds and the head aches and the tears well up...
all the dramatics provide no answer... no clear direction..
just wrapped up in darkness and sinking in the mire...
like i always do.
Saturday, July 23, 2011
Weeping in the Ghetto
and just for shits and giggles... here is some Nick Cave to guide you through your Saturday...
Captain PirateFace
It's Saturday and I feel "loopy"....
Welcome!
No funds... No Gas.... No Saturday excursions..... Enjoy some land of the loops while Gabriel and i watch the one of the coolest fucking movies of all time... "The Goonies"
Never Say Die! Talk at you later... Captain PirateFace
Thursday, July 21, 2011
I smile and grin and grimace and fret....
I smile a little through the bullshit of the day and the pain in my body... I smile because i want to.
Capt.PirateFace
Capt.PirateFace
Wednesday, July 20, 2011
Tuesday, July 19, 2011
In the face of realism
In the face of realism i know i have always been a coward... Wish i was brave.
Capt.PirateFace
Capt.PirateFace
Man Alive! I am just so full of wonder and love!!!! (And Shit!!!!!)
In case it wasn't clear... I am in a shitty mood..
captain pirateface
Monday, July 18, 2011
Is happiness so fleeting? Where
Is happiness so fleeting? Where we can bury our grinning alive with our precious dead...
Capt.PirateFace
Capt.PirateFace
Sunday, July 17, 2011
Captain Bumout
some lyrics to Cage's "Captain Bumout"
I such a misfit in social situations I hate it.
Depressed and medicated yet your insecure and naked
I'm tryin to loosen up your dyin to read my sullen eyes
This intellectual black hole reeks of cologne and lies.
This song is making me sick I tell myself "it's fine".
But the DJ will play the beggining for the 6th time.
I hope somebody pulls a gun out and sucks out all the fun out and levels the playing field for Captin Bumout.
and a little bit of ol' Roy Orbison...
I such a misfit in social situations I hate it.
Depressed and medicated yet your insecure and naked
I'm tryin to loosen up your dyin to read my sullen eyes
This intellectual black hole reeks of cologne and lies.
This song is making me sick I tell myself "it's fine".
But the DJ will play the beggining for the 6th time.
I hope somebody pulls a gun out and sucks out all the fun out and levels the playing field for Captin Bumout.
and a little bit of ol' Roy Orbison...
goodnight... for reals...
captain pirateface
Who the fuck do you think you are you pansy!?!?!
i wish... i wish... iwish...i.sissws.,.......
i wish i knew how to figure out this wacky and wicked world... this terrible, mean, cruel world....
i am the most confused human being to crawl around on the face of the planet...
i hope... i hope... i hope....
Goodnight.
Captain PirateFace
Why are the bad guys blessed with the coolest songs?
Saturday, July 16, 2011
And the meat wagon pulls up with hot dogs...
