wtf?

why do I get into trouble when all I want is to be loved?

































fuck you all and goodnight.

Captain PirateFace

i look like a pirate

one of my back teeth fell out.

i am going to end up "really" looking like my moniker.


Luv

Capn' PirateTeeth.... I mean Face.

damn.

wtf?

i am sooooo

over dramatic.

ever get the feeling you are being watched by complete strangers?

wink wink





captain pirateface

.....

.this all fucking sucks.

I am not a great man but I don't deserve to live in a daily living hell.


I can't stop crying anymore.

can't sleep

feel like shit, sad and can't sleep.

it's 5:42am



captain pirateface

//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

i know who i am...
who the hell am i again?

i know that i beg at moons for some kind of amazing answer.
and find god staring down at me with a shit eating grin and the moon wedged gently between his ass.
i know i feel like tearing apart living things and weeping sadly at their very sad demise.
i know that i left my parachute in the plain when when i fucking jumped.
and now the beautiful earth is rushing up at me waiting to lick and taste my fresh splattered guts that shot out of my ass.
i can't eat.
i can't sleep.
i will only nightmare and night terror.
thrash in my sleep like one possessed until my heart finally breaks for the last time....
again.








when will i smile again?
fuck if i know and stop asking.

thank you for tearing out my insides and leaving me here
with this stupid ass look on my face shaking my head and my tears to the ground in giant ant drowning puddles.
my feelings have been not hurt but killed.
i still love you
and i hope you know that.
still loving all the others but you more than any other.
i hope your loneliness drives you to find me again.

nobody home

glass

I used to be sharp.
A teeny bit quick witted.
like
glass.
Now,
I have been
dulled down
soft
by the restless ocean waves.
I am drowning and there is no one there to save me.
Oh God I am scared.
alone.
stupid.
I can already feel the steel in my heart.
killing me.
breaking me
like glass.

running up that hill

"Running up that hill"
By Kate Bush and Amazingly covered by Placebo


It doesn't hurt me.
You wanna feel how it feels?
You wanna know, know that it doesn't hurt me?
You wanna hear about the deal I'm making?
You be running up that hill
You and me be running up that hill

And if I only could,
Make a deal with God,
And get him to swap our places,
Be running up that road,
Be running up that hill,
Be running up that building.
If I only could, oh...

You don't wanna hurt me,
But see how deep the bullet lies.
Unaware that I'm tearing you asunder.
There's a thunder in our hearts, baby.
So much hate for the ones we love?
Tell me, we both matter, don't we?

You, be running up that hill
You and me, be running up that hill
You and me won't be unhappy.

And if I only could,
Make a deal with God,
And get him to swap our places,
Be running up that road,
Be running up that hill,
Be running up that building,
If I only could, oh...

C'mon, baby, c'mon, c'mon, darling,
Let me steal this moment from you now.
C'mon, angel, c'mon, c'mon, darling,
Let's exchange the experience, oh...'

And if I only could,
Make a deal with God,
And get him to swap our places,
Be running up that road,
Be running up that hill,
With no problems

'If I only could, be running up that hill.'











Dying inside,
Captain PirateFace

done

i will no longer be taking my depression meds.

i will no longer care about anything.

I give up and am done.




a pathetic Captain PirateFace